Monday, September 5, 2011

Finding myself on the road to Damascus

Layla is the most gorgeous little girl I've ever seen! Of course I'm a little bias BUT really look at her, I'm sure you can agree! She is getting so big! She's 10 months old, crawling like crazy, pulling herself up, and cruising, jabbering, waving bye-bye, and hello! Loves to get into things ! Loves learning! If I ask her what a dog says she barks, if I ask what a bear says she growls, and we're trying to learn more about animals! She is a beautiful funny little girl. She does this funny breathing thing were she scrunches her nose and smiles at me. Oh I just want to melt she's so cute! 

SO now that I've talked about how wonderful and great my daughter is I've thought about my new identity as a mother and a wife, and also a new me. When I was 18 I was on top of the world and had a plan. Then I met the love of my life, and plans changed a little. Then we decided to have a sweet little baby and nine months later a sweet baby was here. Well, through all of these changes I wasn't sure how I fit into them. 

One of my favorite Apostles is President Uchtdorf. He gives such powerful talks. One he gave recently was called "Waiting on the Road to Damascus." He begins with the story of Saul and how he was up fronted by an angel asking him why thou persecutest me and Saul changed his life. This all happened on the road to Damascus. President Uchtdorf talks about how a lot of us don't make the great change Saul did to becoming Paul, a lot of us just wait on the road to Damascus. He said this: 

"The truth is, those who diligently seek to learn of Christ eventually will come to know Him. They will personally receive a divine portrait of the Master, although it most often comes in the form of a puzzle—one piece at a time. Each individual piece may not be easily recognizable by itself; it may not be clear how it relates to the whole. Each piece helps us to see the big picture a little more clearly. Eventually, after enough pieces have been put together, we recognize the grand beauty of it all. Then, looking back on our experience, we see that the Savior had indeed come to be with us—not all at once but quietly, gently, almost unnoticed.
This can be our experience if we move forward with faith and do not wait too long on the road to Damascus."
Isn't that incredible. I decided I was going to find myself! Find Christ myself! I love the Gospel! So I've been trying to read my scriptures better, and I've been writing in my journal everyday, and I found something that I'm really excited about that has given me such a confidence boost! I'm now a Mary Kay Independent Beauty Consultant! I love Mary Kay products and I love the confidence it gives me! I hope that I can give the women around me the happiness, confidence, and wonderful feelings I've gotten from becoming a Beauty Consultant and wearing makeup that's good for my skin! I've been able to boost my confidence and feel like I'm doing something again, something I like. I've also been so happy because I feel like I've been a better mother because I have somewhere to fill my bucket. 
By the way, I've been trying to figure out how to better "play" with Layla. Like I take her to the park, read her books, take her on walks, play with toys, and I've been trying to teach animal sounds, and where parts of our face is  ( ear, eyes, mouth, nose...etc.) what else do you do with ten month olds, eleven months olds? I've tried to do signs with her, but she doesn't seem interested. Anyways... what is a way that I can get her interested in signs? Anyways, Love ya'll!!! 


  1. As far as the signing thing goes, just keep doing the signs even if she doesn't seem interested. Miles didn't do any of them back till he was about a year, but then all the ones that I'd' been showing him since he was Layla's age just started popping up! It was cool. This is a hard age to entertain. They can't really play with others very well yet and aren't too great at entertaining themselves, so you're pretty busy entertaining them! We would do a lot of texture play I guess you could call it. I let Miles play in pudding or paint, sand, water, etc. Measuring beans in a bucket etc. Just things to keep their hands busy. It's messy, but fun! Good luck! Come visit us anytime if you need to get out of the house!

  2. Love the quote from Elder Uchtdorf! Also, she is beautiful! I love the picture!

  3. That IS an excellent talk. Thanks for sharing. I'm so glad that you have found something to help you be yourself again. I completely understand that feeling of being "missing" like I'm a stranger in my own life. Finding an outlet like that is a great help. And your right, Layla is a DOLL!